Forgiving is a big word that we don’t always understand. It’s not just telling someone that you forgive them to make it true.
Forgiving is even less forgetting. To forgive is to free the one who has hurt you and to free yourself from pain at the same time. There is still a common misconception that the person who has offended you feels bad until he or she has been forgiven.
This is not entirely true. When someone hurts you, if you do not sincerely forgive the person who committed the affront, you will not have peace. Accept the apology of someone who has hurt you and you will see that you will feel better.
Forgiveness is not easy, even more so when you have been hurt very badly, but forgiveness is possible and you must forgive.
The importance of forgiveness
If you want to have a happy life, you must forgive. Holding a grudge against someone does not help you to achieve complete happiness. Just hating someone is an emotion and can destroy you. If you want to have light in your life, forgive and let nature take care of the rest.
If you feel that there is something wrong in your life or that you are going in circles, look for it! You probably haven’t forgiven anyone. Forgiveness doesn’t only relieve the person who has offended. Forgiving also liberates you and gives you greatness.
How do you know if you have forgiven?
There are a number of questions you will need to ask yourself to be sure you have forgiven. It may happen that you feel you have forgiven when the reality is quite different. If you have truly forgiven, you should no longer feel resentment. When you think about that person or when you see that person, you shouldn’t be bitter.
You must ask yourself if you are not particularly harsh or demanding with those who have offended you. You should not have any feelings of rage or hatred in you. Your words must not be hurtful, you must not throw in each other’s face what the others have done to you. Don’t go back to old wounds and don’t talk all the time about those who have hurt you.
The sight of someone who has hurt you should not make you angry or bitter. Above all, you must not make each other pay for each other’s mistakes. You should not try to control people because they are not objects. Don’t become negative and sincerely forget the past.
Just because you have forgiven doesn’t mean you agree with what was done to you. Forgiving does not mean forgetting. To forgive is to liberate the other by freeing their soul. You will feel much better after you have forgiven. Forgiveness is not an empty word, it is a behavior.
Not forgiving has consequences
If you do not forgive, your feelings of hate and anger will poison your existence and make you suffer. You will constantly remind yourself of painful events and stir the knife in the wound. It is like a venom that slowly paralyzes you. In the act of forgiveness, you are not obliged to become friends with the person who has offended you. Just give him or her your sincere forgiveness.
If you do not forgive, it will follow you in all your social relationships. You will become suspicious and you may lose everything. Let’s take the example of a couple. When one partner has been unfaithful and the couple breaks up, the hurt remains. If the one who was cheated on has not forgiven, he will carry this into all his future stories. He will tend to think that everyone is the same. He will be suspicious and may even jeopardize his relationship by losing someone who is truly sincere.
If the deceived spouse had simply and sincerely forgiven, he or she could have had a new story. Instead, he or she may lose everything and commit sins as well because he or she has hurt others.
If you have been hurt, you become hurtful when you do not forgive. You make others pay for what was done to you. As is often said, others pay the price. Don’t put yourself in this vicious cycle. Make love, not war! Have greatness and purity in your soul. Forgive and move on. Life is too short to hold a grudge.
What’s the point of becoming embittered and resentful for mistakes that others have made? The best thing is to forgive. It is not enough to say, “I forgive you,” for this to be effective. Forgive, yes! But truly forgive from the bottom of your heart to free your soul. When we forgive, we do it mostly for ourselves because holding a grudge also makes us suffer.