You can’t become a “better person” in this relationship
This applies to your inner state as well as your professional plans. The person next to you not only doesn’t allow you to fulfill yourself and do what you love, but constantly undermines your self-confidence, emotional balance and ability to enjoy life. You feel constantly depressed, you hate yourself when, once again, you can’t keep your cool after hearing another complaint. Life seems to be passing you by because it is already the tenth month that you intend to take piano lessons or computer programming training but your partner not only doesn’t inspire you, but tries to find all kinds of arguments to explain why it is a bad idea.
In a harmonious and happy couple, people should grow and develop together, encouraging and helping each other in every way possible. If one or both are dragging the other down, then it’s no longer a bell, but real alarm bells that let you know it’s time to take decisive action.
You are no longer proud of your partner
Think about it: when someone asks you how your partner is doing and how everything is going with him/her, how do you feel? Do you want to talk with joy and pride about your love, the happiness of being together, the happiness of having found such a kind, determined and wonderful person? At the beginning of a relationship, we could talk about our partner for hours, even though happiness loves silence. Simply because we feel lucky to have met the love of our life in whom we see almost no flaws.
A little later, when the wave of blind love passes, of course, we all begin to understand that there are no ideal people and our chosen one is no exception. But the difference between happy relationships and those doomed to failure is that in the first case, lovers are less obsessed with evil and continue to be proud of their choice, while in the second case, pride quickly gives way to disappointment and even discontent.
There are no special and meaningful moments between you
Suddenly, you realize that there is not much difference between when you were single and now that you are in this relationship. There may be a little more emotion than when you were single, but in general, nothing good comes from being in a relationship. When you talk about your relationship and say “it’s good, everything is ok, nothing special”, there is a problem, because love is, from the beginning, a magical feeling that changes our consciousness. And it’s not even about big parties, surprises and super important events. But when a couple has genuine and reciprocal feelings and enjoys each other’s company, they make jokes that only they understand, give each other tender and funny nicknames and things like that. Even the simplest walk around the house takes on a special twist and meaning and is filled with those “moments” that lovers will remember fondly for many years to come. But if you live like neighbors who have almost nothing to exchange or, worse, a lot of things that bother you at each other’s house, then it’s time to honestly pull out the white flag and admit that this is the end.
Your partner starts to irritate you during hard times
If in difficult times (not related to your relationship), you are more stressed by your partner’s presence than by the circumstances themselves, it means that he or she is no longer an ally but, instead, an additional burden in this difficult time. When one of the partners has a misfortune – he or she is fired from his or her job, misdiagnosed, or simply falls into depression – the loved one tries in every way to support the other, looking for ways to solve the problems and, of course, tries to encourage him or her and make him or her feel that everything is going to be okay.
If in your relationship, in a situation like this, you prefer to be alone, and you literally have to put up with the person next to you, or you end up expressing anger to him, this is also a direct sign that something is wrong.
The future doesn’t matter to you anymore
You’re tired of fighting and bickering, and even more tired of wondering if you made the right decision by getting together with this person. Walking away from the situation and the relationship becomes the easiest decision, and you repeat more and more to yourself: “Let what must happen happen”, putting the responsibility for your life and your future in the higher forces and in the destiny. But it is important to understand that time is running out, and as you close your eyes to your dissatisfaction with your partner and the life you share with him/her, precious weeks, months or even years go by, and you will never be able to make up for this precious time.
You start to fantasize and become more and more interested in others
Feeling an attraction for someone or noticing how beautiful and talented someone is is normal, even if you’re in a relationship. But imagining how wonderful it would be to be single or in a relationship with that “other person”, or worse, shamelessly seeking eye contact and setting up meetings with others, is already a clear sign that your romance is about to explode. And if you want more details, it means that you have already mentally separated from your partner several times and are ready for radical changes.
If you remember the happy moments when peace and harmony reigned in your relationship, you will realize that in a strong relationship there is no room for this kind of fantasy, because your heart is 100% occupied with the loved one. But if this kind of doubt has already seeped into your head, then you don’t expect anything good from your current relationship and try to find peace and joy elsewhere, even if you haven’t fully realized it yet.
Emotional silence” has entered the relationship
This is another type of indifference, which no longer refers to life and future plans, but to the couple itself. We often hear that love cannot be passionate and full of emotions all our life. When the stage of crazy love of the beginning is over, a period of affection, respect, warmth, serene harmony arrives. This is absolutely true, we are not going to discuss it. But in fulfilled relationships, this period is still full of emotions, but of a different kind. Maybe these emotions are less vivid, seductive and crazy than in the beginning, when both feel they can move mountains for each other, but keeping the flame burning allows the couple to not lose interest in each other, to keep that empathy and the desire to care for each other.
But when there’s no trace of emotions left, it’s very easy to determine: you don’t care about the other person’s life, you don’t try to communicate with them, and you think twice before saying something nice and cute, because either you’re not sure you really mean it, or you think you’ll be ignored.
In the relationship, there is uncontrolled and unfounded jealousy
This is the opposite of the previous point, which does not lead to anything good either. It is likely that most people, deep down, enjoy being the object of jealousy that is within reasonable limits. After all, it’s flattering: if someone is jealous, it’s because you’re considered a really beautiful, interesting and attractive person. You think it’s wonderful that your boyfriend thinks you can seduce someone even in an old t-shirt, or that your girlfriend thinks hordes of girls will fall for you if you go out to buy bread in holey jeans. This means that you are genuinely appreciated and valued.
