Whether you’re in a new relationship or if you and your partner have been together for a while, there are certain things to watch out for. Every relationship is different, so it’s always best to know for yourself. However, here are eight red flags you can pay a little extra attention to in a relationship.
You’re afraid to discuss things with your partner
If you feel nervous or afraid to talk, disagree or argue with your partner, ask yourself why that is. Are you afraid they will get angry or upset with you? What do you think will happen then? If you are constantly tiptoeing around your partner and doing everything to please them, think twice about whether you should really stay in the relationship.
Everything is a problem for your partner
Keep track of how your partner deals with stress and difficult situations. Coming home and ranting about something that happened to them during the day is one thing – but taking it out on you by shouting or banging on doors at home to vent their frustration is another. If your partner throws a tantrum over the slightest thing, you’ll determine how much of their drama you can handle or dare to be around for.
He’s always spoiling you with flowers and stuff
Of course, receiving flowers, chocolates or romantic gestures is very sweet. But when your partner does it all the time, it’s good to ask yourself if there’s any reason why. Are they doing it to say sorry and then think everything is fine? Are they jealous of someone and want to show that person that you’re “taken” (no one forgets the Friends episode when Ross sent stuff to Rachel’s job because he was jealous of her new co-worker), or is it a way for your partner to control you? If you think it is, it could be a sign that you’re in a relationship where you’re being emotionally exploited, and that’s never okay.
He’s laughing at you
Not like they’re laughing at you if you might trip on the edge of the mat, but that they’re laughing at you when you tell them about your dreams and goals, and think you can’t reach them. If you are with someone who makes you feel small and who makes you doubt yourself and your abilities, dump them now. They are definitely not worthy of you, and it is doubtful that they can change themselves and their behaviour.
You are not included in their life
If you’ve been seeing each other for a while, you should have met the person’s friends, and maybe even some family members. If they keep separating friend-time and you-time, ask yourself (or better yet, them) why that is. If they don’t have a good answer, it’s time to either meet the friends or feel out whether you want it that way in a relationship. And if the situation looks like it’s your partner who hasn’t been allowed to see your friends, ask yourself why.
Everything is always someone else’s fault
Yes, sometimes it’s someone else’s fault that something happens. But if your partner is constantly making excuses when they’ve done something that’s ONLY their fault, it’s time to think about whether you’re okay with that.
You’re just hanging out with each other
When the relationship is new and you’re newly in love, it’s no wonder that you’d rather sit huddled together most of the time. And yes, you might think it’s really romantic to just hang out with each other. But after a few weeks, it’s important to remember that you have friends too. Hanging out with your partner all the time makes it easy for your friends to disappear, as you never hear from them or hang out with them anyway. It can also be quite helpful for the relationship if you and your partner get away from each other sometimes and spend time with other people.
You just want to be on your best behaviour, all the time
Of course, you may not want to show your worst side in a relationship, but you still need to be able to be yourself. If you feel you need to pretend in front of your partner, it’s wise to ask yourself what might be behind that feeling. And if your partner doesn’t like you for who you are, say goodbye to your relationship.
