When we want to build a harmonious, responsible and fulfilling relationship, we must discover ourselves, identify our needs and directions, and be honest with ourselves. We suggest you answer these five questions and discover whether you are heading towards a fulfilling relationship or already in one.
Do we have things in common, or do we love each other?
The idea that we love a person and our feelings should be enough for a beautiful relationship, especially if shared with us, may not be complete. It’s not wrong, but it’s not complete.
It’s not enough to love and be loved for the relationship to take wings and last over time, but in reality, our relationship is about more than that. In addition to love, we need understanding, acceptance, compassion and empathy, effective communication, and shared values in life and future directions that allow the relationship to unfold.
So are the two compatible? Can they form a long-term team?
Domestic responsibilities – how are they divided?
A fulfilling relationship means that, at some point, the two partners will live together. It means they will share their taboos, habits, and private space, learn to accept and desire each other and possibly compromise.
Household chores take up a lot of time and can create tension in the relationship, even frustration. Can these be shared evenly between partners?
Emotional communication: what are each other’s emotional needs, and how do you respond to them?
There is a difference between being loved and feeling loved. For each, there is a specific way in which we will feel loved if love is presented to us. Certain gestures matter to everyone and feed the need to be loved.
What are these “ingredients” of each partner? Can you identify them? Can you ask (communicate) and offer them? Do you resonate with them or agree with them regarding your partner’s emotional needs? And vice versa, from partner to you should be accurate.
Do you have typical hobbies?
Of course, everyone will have their separate hobbies, but it is good to have some in common. To spend time together in a varied and exciting way. Maybe sometimes it’s not enough to see each other at home after work. At dinner, every day, possibly also to carry out each other’s household responsibilities, for this to be called couple life, interspersed with a holiday or two.
Connecting the two partners may require more than that, and having shared hobbies can be crucial.
Do you see yourselves in a family, possibly with children? Growing old together?
Partners who form deep, balanced, and fulfilled couples don’t think about breaking up; they design the future and make it possible; they act on it now. They take on responsibilities independently, and without being asked, they find themselves in the idea of family and can think about children. They plan for this, develop themselves, and create resources for an extended family life, where partners have each other, love, support, and understand each other in family “projects,” growing old together.
Compatibility in a couple certainly means more than attraction.